The Blemished Rose

The topic of suicide sometimes rears its head in the media but, like mental health, there is a stigma attached to it. I must admit that I’ve wanted to write about the subject for quite some time now but haven’t known how to broach the subject efficiently. I guess it’s a difficult subject for anyone to talk about but it’s not something that we can ignore as it affects so many people who are left behind. When I read accounts of families/friends who have lost loved ones to suicide, a frequent question asked is “Why did he/she do it?” It will always be impossible to know exactly why someone chose to end their life as there are lots of possible underlying reasons. However, it is worth noting that over 90% of people who die by suicide have a mental illness at the time of their death.  Everyone goes through rocky patches in their lives but some people have been dealt a tougher hand when it comes to life circumstances. Vulnerability to suicide could be a result of: a history of sex...

Last year, when I was having weekly counselling sessions, I drew a little sketch to illustrate some of my issues. I realised that most of my problems are a result of the core issue: CSA. Counselling enabled me to work through some of my issues and grow in confidence like a blooming rose.                                               When I wrote about these issues last year, I realised that some triggers were making me feel the same way that I did as a child. As I started to feel more confident, I realised that I didn’t deserve to feel that way. The last statement before each rose includes the word ‘deserve’, these are the statements I wrote:                                 ...